26 Jun Why Anger Management Is Such An Important Skill
What is Anger?
Anger is an emotion that arises as a response to circumstances viewed as unfavorable/undesirable by the person. A vital component in anger is the antagonism of persons or situations that has caused the undesirable result. Anger is a last resort response that comes after the person understands the fact deep within themselves that they are not in direct control of their circumstances. Just like how a cornered animal tends to attack by lashing out, anger makes a person behave in very similar patterns. Uncontrolled anger comes as a result of a deep-seated feeling of being weak or not adequate enough to handle their life. But it isn’t all negative. If a person is able to control their anger, communicate with themselves and know themselves properly, anger can be used as a driving force for them to take action and improve their circumstances in life.
The problems arise when one cannot control this emotion, leading to them becoming a slave to it and behaving in ways they normally wouldn’t. Oftentimes, the ones around them, including their loved ones suffer due to this for very obvious reasons. Thus, there can be negative results all around when it comes to the afflicted person’s relationships. Both personal and professional. After all, nobody likes being around unpleasantness. Anger can be expressed in 3 main ways. Passive aggression, Open aggression, and Assertion, of which, Assertion is the best way which I mentioned earlier, by controlling anger and being properly communicative.
How to identify if you require Anger Management?
- It becomes very obvious that one requires active anger management if one’s personal and professional relationships are getting negatively affected due to it.
- If a person is becoming overly critical and judgemental of others and starts to lose interest and avoids talking to people, that’s a deeper anger problem that has to be resolved.
- If a person takes a very grim and dark outlook of the world and life in general, it could again be due to anger that hasn’t been dealt with, and which has piled up over the years due to reasons like failures, dejections, and general negative and harsh experiences.
- If a person is becoming depressed, it can also be a result of unresolved anger. The mental baggage thus created, weighs a person down and doesn’t allow them to fly through life like they’re meant to.
- If a person is unable to express their emotions properly, it can be due to them climbing into their shell due to unresolved anger from past emotional wounds.
- If a person is getting involved in addictions and substance abuse, it’s due to a void within themselves they’re trying to fill. This void can be due to unresolved anger issues or due to negative results of life created due to a person’s uncontrolled anger.
- If a person tends to naturally be aggressive outwardly through intolerance, a sharp tongue, being unnecessarily loud and reactive, it can be due to anger mismanagement.
- If a person is suffering very similar patterns in all of their interpersonal relationships where other people are finding it unpleasant to talk with them or feel like they’re walking on eggshells around them, it can be due to the person’s angry, confrontational and judgemental nature.
Why should you consult a therapist for Anger Management?
If you feel you’re suffering the negative effects of uncontrolled anger, it’s absolutely advisable to talk to a therapist to solve the problem.
A therapist’s role is to guide a person in the right direction and the proof of efficient execution of this lies in time. Namely, the years of experience a therapist has in dealing with these issues with a wide variety of persons suffering from them.
It can be very tempting to try to resolve these issues all by ourselves, but oftentimes, we must realize that we require a proper guide to make sure we don’t accidentally exacerbate any issues we already have.
Moreover, an extra pair of helping hands, or in this case, listening ears makes it easy to deal with the weight of the situation. Sometimes, we all don’t have to deal with everything on our own. We are not alone. We have company. We have help. That’s the beauty of human nature. We can always help each other out. So it’s always wise to get help from a professional when it’s possible.